Words on Bathroom Walls

Julia WaltonFiction | Novel | YA | Published in 2017

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Chapters 28-31Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Chapter 28 Summary

The doctors begin the slow process of weaning Adam off the ToZaPrex, so Adam is relieved that he’ll still be on the drug for a while. He has to submit weekly blood and urine tests to make sure his body doesn’t show worsening signs. Adam decides his therapist is the best of all the doctors because “you never make me pee in a cup” (189).

At school, rehearsals continue for Stations of the Cross, which is a nice distraction from baby preparations. At home, Paul is obviously stressed, and Adam’s mother cries at everything. Adam is in charge of dessert at the upcoming baby shower. He invites Maya over to help him make a list of things he’ll need. When they realize they are alone in the house, they rush upstairs, only to hear the garage door open. Maya leaves. Adam is frustrated, wondering whether they just missed their opportunity to have sex. Rebecca shoots him grins and twirls her hair, looking “pleased with herself about something” (193).

Chapter 29 Summary

After Stations of the Cross rehearsal one day, Adam goes to put things away in the storage room like he always does. Maya enters the little closet and closes the door. They have sex for the first time, which is a satisfying experience for both. Adam realizes he loves Maya. After lying together naked for a while, they leave.

Adam acknowledges that it’s strange for him to write down these details in his therapy notebook, but he really doesn’t care. He just hopes that telling the therapist this “proves I can have a normal life” (198).

Chapter 30 Summary

Adam’s mother insists the family go to church for Easter Sunday. After the incident earlier in the ToZaPrex trial, Adam avoids looking at the stained glass. The mass goes fine. Maya sits in the front of the church with her family. She sees Adam and blushes. Adam knows she’s thinking about having sex in the storage room, which makes him smirk because “it’s hard not to feel a little smug about that” (200).

Chapter 31 Summary

Adam finds the mob boss and his associates lounging in the family room. The boss munches on cannoli, wiping the sugar on a blanket. Though Adam knows the boss isn’t real, he still gets mad about the boss using the blanket as a napkin. The boss taunts Adam about Maya, saying she’ll ditch him when she learns about the schizophrenia. Adam counters that the boss isn’t real, but the boss retorts that all of Adam’s hallucinations are real and a part of Adam. The boss leaves Adam with the warning that “The drugs can only do so much” (203). Adam goes back to bed, where Rebecca squeezes his hand in her sleep.

Chapters 28-31 Analysis

These chapters are the culmination of the calm before the storm. Adam and Maya having sex represents the high point of their relationship thus far—like the “normal” teenager Adam aspires to be, he has managed to find a secluded place to have a sexual encounter with his girlfriend. Adam’s desperation to cling to this kind of life is palpable in his journal: Writing about the experience with Maya for his therapist, Adam wants to cement what happened as proof that he is in control of his life and mind.

Chapter 31 is another turning point for Adam’s mental health, providing yet more evidence of the slow decline of ToZaPrex’s effectiveness. For the first time in the novel, Adam has an emotional reaction to the Boss’s actions and words even though he still knows that the Boss isn’t real. The novel uses their argument not only to point out Adam’s increasingly troubling hallucinations, but also to dramatize Adam’s inner quarrel with himself. Here, the Boss represents truths Adam knows but doesn’t want to admit—that the drug is failing him, and that Adam will never be fully free of his visions, which are an inherent part of the way his mind works.

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At the same time, the conversation between Adam and the Boss mirrors the kinds of internal debates neurotypical people have when they feel conflicted. Adam converses with an imagined person, but the outcome is no different than anyone else who confronts information they don’t want to face. He gets mad and refuses to acknowledge the truth in the Boss’s words—truth that he obviously understands since he can manifest it in the mouth of a hallucination.